Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump Go Whitewater Rafting in Maine
Inspired by the 2016 election leading the news most days, we wondered what it would be like to host Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump on a Crab Apple Whitewater rafting trip in Maine during the summer campaign season.
We would have a few logistical hurdles first – emailing a river rafting reservation confirmation to Hillary would be tricky as some of her emails seem to get lost, hidden or classified as state secrets.
Getting to Crabapple Whitewater Rafting in Maine
How would Hillary arrive at Crab Apple Whitewater? – She hasn’t driven a car for 20 years and there is no taxi service to our remote areas in Maine. Similarly, a local dirt landing strip would be unsafe for Trump’s private jet.
Whitewater Rafting Gear
If we got Hillary and the Donald to Crab Apple, getting geared up for the whitewater rafting trip would be tricky. How would Trump’s hair do with a whitewater-rafting helmet? How would the hair look after taking the helmet off? The first spat of the day could be anticipated when Trump makes nasty comments about Hillary’s appearance in a wetsuit.
River Rafting with Trump & Hillary
After safely navigating some big whitewater rapids, Trump may declare that he could build bigger, safer river rapids for a much cheaper price tag than Mother Nature had produced them a few million years ago.
If Trump were to fall out of the raft and be adeptly rescued by his river rafting guide, Trump would declare that the river guide was not his hero because heroes do not let rafters fall out of their raft. However, this brief whitewater swim by Trump may get Hillary thinking and inspire her to plan a Class 11 whitewater rafting trip (on a scale of 1-5!) for Bernie Sanders!
All joking aside, no matter who you are, or your political affiliation, we think you’d enjoy whitewater rafting at Crab Apple. For more information or to book your whitewater rafting excursion, please contact us today.